I started recording myself speaking -no script and no plan, I just spoke what came to mind. I noticed that I was speaking a little too fast,
but there must have been something else that I was missing. Also, at the same time, it so happened that I was feeling compelled to
write a lot more. Perhaps this was my way of compensating for what I thought I lacked (in spoken words). Then it came to me:
My husband and I are each other's critics when we write. He mentioned how my writing style is different than others', and how my
approach is not something with which he felt familiar. He quickly added that, because it was so different, my writing felt "fresh" to him.
It was an "aha" moment for both of us. I had found my answer! It wasn't what I was saying that was causing people not to
understand me, but it was how I was saying it! I was born Thai as a Bangkokian (think New York City), and have traveled the world.
I've put inside me all the things I've learned from different cultures. My marriage, also, is cross-culture. The first time I came to this
country (America) I was young and inexperienced. Now I am here once again, but this time as a well-rounded and grown woman. My
perception is different than most, for they are not from the same situation.
Now I know. I feel tremendous relief to realize that it's not my not knowing how to speak English; but, rather, it's me being who I am at
the time I am. Now that I've solved this puzzle , I have to be mindful how I utilize my English.