If

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What happens in my head doesn't stay inside my head. Instead, I'm buzzing it with Bubble Buzz!
Blame it on the hot-and-dry summer
and the high blood pressure.







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July 23th, 2010


It's been awhile since my last piece of real writing. My mind has wandered in many directions and gotten off-track in so many ways. The mind and the body work together and, when one is a little "off", soon enough the other follows. It started three weeks ago when the weather got very hot and dry, and I was getting my children ready for their annual visit with their grandparents in Bangkok. Plus, the stress of the daily routine and other things that I'd rather not bother talking about sent my blood pressure up to the roof. -That, on its own, excited me enough to send the bp up -yet- another notch. I immediately increased my medication and cut out all the sodium from all the dishes created in my small Coffee Kitchen. Something that I wouldn't worry about normally, since I'm mindful when it comes to cooking. I also loaded my body with many extra glasses of water per day -which made me run to the bathroom on an hourly basis. But that's alright, that's what bathrooms are for. There were also many other little changes that I made. Being the type A personality as -I have been told on several occasions- that I am, the whole thing added even more worries and stress on me. Instead of a quick recovery, it took me too long to snap out of it.


(What is type "A" personality anyway? I have been accused of being "it" several times, but I don't care enough to find out whether my accusers were right. I am not here to please everyone. I am who I am and I go by what I do -all under one strict rule: I don't hurt people as I do my thing. Should that make a few people feel better about themselves by "fitting" me into a certain category, then go ahead, and have a blast while it lasts.)


While I was dealing with 'getting over it', I tried to keep up with my work and was able to switch onto auto pilot mode for several tasks. But some areas demanded a little more than that. I needed to be creative, -something that just doesn't happen, since it takes the eyes and the brain to connect and sparkle before the creative juice starts flowing -and that part went out-of-order as soon as my whole face started to throb and, later on, felt so swollen as though it would pop like a balloon -all from the rising of pressure.





I was frustrated and felt that I was an under-achiever, but eventually accepted the fact that it was something I had to allow to run its course. In other words, I can't control everything.


Ah, but I can prevent things by taking some precautions! -Somewhere in my head, cried a faint little voice.


If I were to lead an unstressful life it might have resulted in doing only what I felt I was here to do, marrying someone that passed my some three hundred relatives' approval with high scores, having fewer children, being less daring and less adventurous, or taking less chances, boiling down to a lot less fun. If I would eat low sodium everything. Eeew. If I would seek different sources of calcium other than ice-cream. If I would take exercise seriously after giving birth to each baby. If..if..if.


All of this from thinking how to prevent high blood pressure on one hot summer day, which lingered into a three-week thing.


Another "if". -If I could go back in time with this knowledge and re-make my choices, would I? Or, would I stay with the ones I made, and learn-and-grow? It's funny how, when you give something a thought, it does go a long way. As silly as it seems, it does bring up to the surface different aspects from an angle that normally isn't that interesting to you.


I re-trained my daily routine and waited. I "took it easy" on my work load, and when I felt antsy I picked up a book and decided there was no time better than now to finally finish reading it. After all, I started three months ago. When the throbbing inside my head was so bad that all the small print on the laptop screen transformed into dancing dots, big and small, right in front of my eyes, instead of keeping myself going and pushing the limit, I stopped. At some point, when I turned away from high blood pressure provoking habits -which was everything I do, and how I go about things- it made me look-and-see at what was around me. I soon realized that I found my new simple pleasure. The good thing is, I didn't get the work done and I didn't feel badly.


To me, that was a big step.


Maybe I'm finally over "it" and the creative juice starts flowing again! Now, I have to learn to keep the take-it-easy mentality and be able to be "happy" when I look away, or even take some time off once in awhile.


Yeah!

The Buzzin' Bubbles!!!!

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